Spinning

match day-29.JPG, originally uploaded by Ducky Doc.

It's not uncommon knowledge that the information in my Match Day envelope wasn't at all what I was expecting. It left me shocked.

I did something stupid today, I made a pros and cons list about SIU's program. Why on earth did I do this? Needless to say it was a very lopsided list. It left me no better than before. It had no purpose. No matter what I decide about the program I have to go.

What a whiny baby I'm being. I admit it. I'm going to be a Radiologist in 5 years. Which is exactly what I wanted. I guess I was just thinking I could have my cake and eat it too. There are plenty of people out there that didn't match at all. I could be in that boat, and for that I'm thankful.


In case you haven't noticed this blog is more random ramblings than actual insight into me.

Positive Stressors

I love this fish, originally uploaded by Ducky Doc.

To start with a "Dr. Wiki" quote-

"General Adaptation Syndrome-
Hans Selye researched the effects of stress on rats and other animals by exposing them to unpleasant or harmful stimuli. He found that all animals presented a very similar series of reactions, broken into three stages. In 1936, he described this universal response to the stressors as the general adaptation syndrome, or GAS.
Alarm is the first stage. When the threat or stressor is identified or realized, the body's stress response is a state of alarm. During this stage adrenaline will be produced in order to bring about the fight-or-flight response. There is also some activation of the HPA axis, producing cortisol.
Resistance is the second stage. If the stressor persists, it becomes necessary to attempt some means of coping with the stress. Although the body begins to try to adapt to the strains or demands of the environment, the body cannot keep this up indefinitely, so its resources are gradually depleted.
Exhaustion is the third and final stage in the GAS model. At this point, all of the body's resources are eventually depleted and the body is unable to maintain normal function. At this point the initial autonomic nervous system symptoms may reappear (sweating, raised heart rate etc.). If stage three is extended, long term damage may result as the capacity of glands, especially the adrenal gland, and the immune system is exhausted and function is impaired resulting in decompensation."
"Distress is the most commonly-referred to type of stress, having negative implications, whereas eustress is a positive form of stress, usually related to desirable events in a person's life. Both can be equally taxing on the body, and are cumulative in nature, depending on a person's way of adapting to a change that has caused it. The body cannot physically discern between distress or eustress."

Right now lots of wonderful things are happening to me, it's weird.
My body is freaking out with it all. Not sleeping, back hurts, head hurts, stomach hurts. It's all just an odd cycle. While everything is positive it somehow all feels so overwhelming and negative. I know it's all a feedback problem. My body feels exhausted like bad things are happening, but it's really just my body's response to positive things.

I see it happening to the people around me, and we all have different coping mechanisms. Some better than others, some more healthy than others.

It's all very hard for me to explain so I have no idea why I decided to try to write about it.
Probably because I'm avoiding another positive stressor-Studying for an exam.